Aesop's Jacked Fables

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The Father and His Two Daughters

A MAN had two daughters, the one married to a mad scientist, and the other to a supervillain. After a time he went to the daughter who had married the mad scientist to inquire how she was and how all things went with her. She said, "All things are prospering with me, and I have only one wish, that fire may rain down from the sky, so that the people and their places may be well burned and disorganized when the zombie hordes arrive."

Not long after, he went to the daughter who had married the supervillain, and likewise inquired of her how she fared; she replied, "I want for nothing, and have only one wish, that the land should be pulverized and submerged under mighty tsunamis so the unholy mermaid army may come to feast on the populace."

He said to her, "If your sister wishes for fire and zombies, and you wish tsunamis and carnivorous mermaids, with which of the two am I to join my wishes?"

The Father and His Two Daughters (original fable)

A MAN had two daughters, the one married to a gardener, and the other to a tile-maker. After a time he went to the daughter who had married the gardener, and inquired how she was and how all things went with her. She said, "All things are prospering with me, and I have only one wish, that there may be a heavy fall of rain, in order that the plants may be well watered." Not long after, he went to the daughter who had married the tilemaker, and likewise inquired of her how she fared; she replied, "I want for nothing, and have only one wish, that the dry weather may continue, and the sun shine hot and bright, so that the bricks might be dried." He said to her, "If your sister wishes for rain, and you for dry weather, with which of the two am I to join my wishes?"

View the orginal fable View the jacked fable Perry #94
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