Aesop's Jacked Fables

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The Astronaut

AN ASTRONAUT was floating about and observing the stars. As he drifted through the cosmos with his whole attention fixed on the cosmos, a meteoroid smashed him in the face, cracking his visor. The fractures slowly gave way to the void, which sucked at the suit's atmosphere with increasing intensity. While he lamented and bewailed the cold, unmerciful vacuum of space, and cried loudly for help, a Space Controller was deployed to the area.

The Controller, flashing a beam into his eyes said: "What are you doing out here? You mind telling us why you're laying out here screaming like a lunatic? Do you have any weapons on you? You want to tell us what drugs you're on? Ha! I've heard that one a million times before! Is this your vehicle over here? You mind if I look through it? Look, if you want to sit in jail while I get a warrant that's fine with me. If you have nothing to hide then you have nothing to worry about."

The Astronomer (original fable)

AN ASTRONOMER used to go out at night to observe the stars. One evening, as he wandered through the suburbs with his whole attention fixed on the sky, he fell accidentally into a deep well. While he lamented and bewailed his sores and bruises, and cried loudly for help, a neighbor ran to the well, and learning what had happened said: "Hark ye, old fellow, why, in striving to pry into what is in heaven, do you not manage to see what is on earth?"

View the orginal fable View the jacked fable Perry #40
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