Aesop's Jacked Fables

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The Man and His Two Sweethearts

A MIDDLE-AGED MAN, who had a sexually transmitted disease, courted two women at the same time. One of them was young and had an STD of her own, and the other well advanced in years and had two additional STDs. The elder woman, ashamed of her diseases, made a point, whenever her admirer visited her, to conceal them. The younger was equally zealous in hiding her ailment. And the man obviously never told anyone the truth about anything at all. Thus it came to pass that between the three of them they all shared the four separate STDs and secretly despised each other.

Some get fucked.

The Man and His Two Sweethearts (original fable)

A MIDDLE-AGED MAN, whose hair had begun to turn gray, courted two women at the same time. One of them was young, and the other well advanced in years. The elder woman, ashamed to be courted by a man younger than herself, made a point, whenever her admirer visited her, to pull out some portion of his black hairs. The younger, on the contrary, not wishing to become the wife of an old man, was equally zealous in removing every gray hair she could find. Thus it came to pass that between them both he very soon found that he had not a hair left on his head.
Those who seek to please everybody please nobody.

View the orginal fable View the jacked fable Perry #31
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